Conscious Awareness Means We Agree to Live Focused and Present
12 Life Skills that can Change Your World
“What we hold dear can heal the world.” –Mark Nepo
Twelve-steps needn’t be limited to just substance-abuse recovery. Think about the number twelve in common cycles like the months in a year, weeks in a season or quantity in a dozen. This article is the fourth in a twelve-part series highlighting top life-enhancing practices that can make us feel happier, healthier and more alive. By focusing our attention on these integrated positive life skills, we begin a synergistic practice that leads to permanent proficiency by building a useful toolbox for greater self-mastery. Each of the skills in this series is well defined in order to give clarity, direction and action challenges that can help the curious and willing reader cultivate greater wellbeing and flourishing in your daily life. People who consider themselves to be most satisfied with their lives recognize that by constantly challenging themselves to learn, grow and expand they feel more alive connected, and joyful in the world. Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is to open your heart and mind in order to soar! Read on…practice makes permanent…
3 Top Tips for Owning Your Life
Lisa Cypers Kamen, MA
As adults, we are fully aware of our responsibilities. As we grow up, our parents begin by giving us various responsibilities, such as chores around the house, or finishing our homework before going to bed. We learn responsibility at such a young age because it is a key essential to our lives. Imagine a world where there were no repercussions for your actions. Well, that’s definitely not our world and that is why we have responsibilities.
“There is an expiry date on blaming your parents for steering you in the wrong direction;
the moment you are old enough to take the wheel, responsibility lies with you.”
When we learn to accept full responsibility for our thoughts, feelings, actions, and decisions we are relieved of regret and resentment. The reason for this is because we are forced to take charge of the life we experience and live. Optimally, we are taught how to be responsible at a young age. Of course, there are times when we wish we were not the adult and did not have to make the final decision. There are always those days when we rather not take action upon an unforeseen circumstance, but this is what we have been trained to do as we grew up. Be sure of yourself and embrace the responsibility that is upon you.
Here are some tips for how to maintain our sense of responsibility:
1. RESPONSIBILITY IS A FACT OF LIFE. If we can think, breathe, do and be then we possess the ingredients of being a responsible human. That does not mean that we can be in charge of every circumstance or event in our lives but it does mean we can be the master over the one and only person on the planet we can truly control, OURSELVES!
– Write down 3-5 things that you’ve recently been given responsibility for. Jot down your thoughts and feelings about these responsibilities. How do you see these events as positive? Conversely, do they seem negative to you in some way? If so, why is this?
– Write down what the term ‘responsibility’ means to you. How did you learn to take responsibility in life?
2. THE BLAME GAME. This one is the most common things people do. We tend to blame our lack of initiative on someone else, or make excuses for ourselves. Listen to yourself next time your boss asks you why you were late on your deadline again. Don’t make an excuse. Be honest. Tell them you had a busy weekend with your kids, or visited your in-laws, and by the time you got home you were too tired. When you blame it on someone else, or make excuses, you sound irresponsible. If this becomes a habit, your boss will likely lose his/her trust in you.
– Have you been playing the blame game? In what ways? Write down 2-5 times you have played the blame game in recent years. Why did you resort to this strategy? What could have been a more positive way to deal with things
– Whining is not pretty but can offer a constructive moment to vent. Think about past situations where you have joined a pity party including whining and complaining about disappointing outcomes. Did it help you? Most likely not. Consider a measured alternative by allowing yourself a moment of constructive wallowing to air your grievances, and then move on.
3. ADMITTING YOUR MISTAKES. We all have those moments where we have failed due to a mistake. A responsible person will admit to that mistake and do his/her best not to make that mistake again. Why? Because we can learn from our mistakes. Next time you find yourself in a similar situation; don’t go down the same path. Utilize the skills you learned last time to overcome the mistake.
– Write down at least three times in the last few years that you have found it hard, or impossible to admit a mistake? What was the mistake? Is there a pattern among the mistakes? Now, create a few strategies to help you admit a mistake in the future.
Don’t play the blame game. Work at letting go of the habit of making excuses. Take charge. We all have responsibilities, and they are part of the life experience.
With BIG gratitude and HUGE support,