Learning to Grow Vital Relationships Through Conversations That Matter with Celeste Headlee and Ronald J. Frederick PhD
Original Air Date Wednesday, March 11, 2020
When we are infants our first relationships create a blueprint for which all of our future relationships are based. As we engage with others through personal interactions and conversations, our brains sync up and we build rapport and form relationships. But, only if we are having face-to-face conversations and we are actively engaged in listening to the other person. To discuss the effects our first caregivers and modern technology have on the quality of our relationships, Positive Psychology Podcast Host, Lisa Cypers Kamen speaks with two authors who wish to reignite conversations that matter within our vital relationships. Celeste Headlee describes the chemicals our body creates when we have different kinds of conversations. And, Ronald Frederick discusses how we can change the quality of our relationships by becoming emotionally mindful.
Does something in this conversation resonate with you? Are you in need of a professional speaker who can elevate your tribe & enliven your culture? Lisa Cypers Kamen is an award-winning speaker, author & happiness expert who facilitates life-changing presentations for organizations of any size. The science is clear, happier people thrive in life. If you are ready to inject joy into your organization, find out which program is best for you at Lisa’s Live Events.
- Celeste shares what inspired her to write We Need to Talk: How to Have Conversations that Matter. [1:31]
- Fed by our devices, our dopamine addiction keeps us from in-person conversations and interactions. [6:07]
- How to start having serotonin-inducing conversations. [9:59]
- Ways to become a better listener and conversationalist. [21:38]
Celeste Headlee is an award-winning journalist, professional speaker and author of Heard Mentality and We Need To Talk: How To Have Conversations That Matter. Celeste’s TEDx Talk sharing 10 ways to have a better conversation has over 20 million total views to date.
Book: We Need to Talk: How to Have Conversations that Matter
Ronald J. Frederick — Learning to Grow Vital Relationships:
- An example of how our relationship blueprint is written for a human infant and how patterns play out in life. [37:23]
- Ron’s book, Loving Like You Mean It is about how we can bring our most mindful selves to relationships. [41:01]
- The 4-step process to cultivate emotional mindfulness. [46:05]
Ron Frederick, Ph.D has devoted his career to the practice and teaching of the transformational power of emotional and relational experience. As a clinical psychologist, he studies the neuroscience of emotion and interpersonal connection, drawing on both evidence-based research and attachment theory to offer clients proven strategies for overcoming fear of intimacy and emotional distress to grow deeper and more meaningful relationships.
Book: Loving Like You Mean It: Use the Power of Emotional Mindfulness to Transform Your Relationships
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“We need to engage more with people we care about and self-regulate our smartphone use.” @LisaKamen on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet“Many of us have a tape running, we repeat the same kind of relationships with the same kind of partners that we were raised by.” @LisaKamen on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet “People aren’t having conversations about politics. They are just talking.” @CelesteHeadlee on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet“Fewer than 1 in 5 people think they are generally to blame when a conversation goes bad.” @CelesteHeadlee on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet“You can’t win a conversation.” @CelesteHeadlee on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet“Our electronics are working against us.” @CelesteHeadlee on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet“It professionals restrict their kids from using smartphones and social media. That should tell you something.” @CelesteHeadlee on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet “Scientific research shows that Millennials are better listeners than past generations.” @CelesteHeadlee on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet“When people are listening in an engaged way to someone talking about their lives their brain waves sync up. The brain waves of the listener and speaker begin to move in exact sync.” @CelesteHeadlee on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet“1 in 5 people admit to checking their phone while they are having sex.” @CelesteHeadlee on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet“A recent research study shows your enjoyment of a conversation goes up as the amount you talk goes down.” @CelesteHeadlee on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet“Our earliest experiences in life with our caregivers lays out the foundational software that tells us everything about how relationships go.” — Ronald J. Frederick on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet “People with fearful-avoidant attachment style do things to deactivate their emotional experience.” — Ronald J. Frederick on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet “When we are anxious or feel afraid our primitive system kicks in and we defend.” — Ronald J. Frederick on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet“The way we connect with others is through emotional experience.” — Ronald J. Frederick on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet“Being able to be mindful of our emotional experiences and work with them is the key to having a better relationship.” — Ronald J. Frederick on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet “We chose people because our nervous system meshes with them in some way.” — Ronald J. Frederick on @HH_TalkRadio Click To Tweet
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